I held a book reading at which I defined romance. I used descriptors such as tragic, fulfilling, heartwarming, and transformative. The word from that list that my audience locked onto was tragic. I was asked if romance was tragic or if tragedy was romantic. The reference they used was the tale of Romeo and Juliet.
I am a romantic at heart. I ground myself in the idea that we are all destined for romance in our lives. I dare not define what that will look like. Some of us may find romance with a pet, a location, a soulmate, or within ourselves. However, I also believe that for romance to be true and profound, it must be rooted in our emotions and experiences. It must share, among other things, the tragedy we all experience.
With Romeo and Juliet, they had romance. The story is not about the tragedy that tore at their love and ran between the families. Rather it is about the bond between them. As we find love and passion in their story, we can find similar romance in ourselves, colored by the tragedy and events that fill every aspect of our lives.
For this reason, a true romance novel must weave elements of tragedy into the fiber of the plot. In a well-written book, there must be conflict. In a romance novel, along with conflict, the protagonist must also face tragedy. This can be intertwined with the conflict. It may be tangential to the conflict, or the tragedy may directly lead to the conflict. The integration of tragedy, along with conflict in the storyline, adds depth and color. This depth builds flavor that pulls the reader into the story and pulls the characters deeper into their relationships.
As writers, we come to know and love our characters. I woke the other day, early. I was thinking about a character in my newest work. I chose to have a cup of coffee with this character. Perhaps I am different than other authors, but for me, this is a way to get to know the person I am writing about. As we shared the morning, I wrote. Aspects of her, and qualities about this character began to develop. This writing time allowed me to understand how she looked at the world. It gave me insight into some of the tragedies that she had faced. This information helped me understand how this figure in my book might face conflict that would develop later in the story. It helped me understand how she would interact with her partner as the romance blossomed.
So, I encourage you, as writers, readers, and romantics, to look at the shades, qualities, and different aspects of romance. What is it that builds the perfect romance for you? For me, it is an honest and full investment in all aspects of who I am. I encourage you to put in everything, whether it is of you, or your characters. Let them share the tragedy and the joy. Let them share the adventure and the mundane. Through this, you will capture the essence of romance. After all, romance is holding hands and sitting on a couch. It is sharing a good book just as much as it is hiking in a meadow or finding passion in the Alps.
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